RALLYING AROUND THE
Some people love Donald Trump. Some people, especially around
here, hate Donald Trump. Very few people are indifferent. He is definitely
one of the most polarizing Presidents in history.
However, in the interests of national unity, I would like to
express a character trait of Donald Trump that all people, whether liberal
or conservative, whether rich or poor, can agree is something for which we
all should be eternally grateful.
Let us all raise our glass and toast the fact that Donald
Trump does not drink alcohol.
I've been thinking about this because I'm amazed at some of
the things he says or does without having slammed down a few beers or a
couple of margaritas. Try to imagine him three sheets to the wind.
It's a sobering thought.
The obvious example is his tweets. He has taken "drunk
dials," to a new level, worthy of a new term. Consider one of
his more memorable tweets, posted on March 4, 2017, at 5:02 a.m.:
"How low has President Obama gone to tapp my phones
during the very sacred election process. This is Nixon/Watergate. Bad (or
What if Donald had just downed his last tequila shot of the
night? What would he have tweeted at 5:02 a.m. in that case? I shudder to
Or how about his 3:10 a.m. tweet regarding his former good
buddy, FBI director James Comey, whom he angrily called a "leaker."
Or his 3:33 a.m. missive against CNN and fake news. Or his 6:21 a.m.
doctored video of him body slamming a CNN reporter.
These tweets, and thousands of others, are the work of
someone without a drop of alcohol in their system. That's
impressive. And very scary to think of the alternative.
The same holds true for his relationship with women. It
has been alleged that our Commander-in-Chief has had extra marital affairs
with a porn star and a Playboy bunny, both of whom he met at a Lake Tahoe
golf tournament, where alcohol flows like water.
Yet none touched his lips. If the accusations are true,
imagine the carnage he would have wrought with a few bottles of wine each
night. And try to envision the list of women (which stands at about 15)
who would be accusing him of sexual harassment if he was out drinking and
partying in bars for all those years before he was elected President.
Fortunately, he has the willpower of a saint, and has stated
many times that he has never had an alcoholic drink in his life, except
for occasionally taking communion. "I have no longing for it. I have
no interest in it," he has said.
He claims he was turned off to alcohol because of the trials
of his brother, Fred Trump Jr., who was an alcoholic and tragically died
of complications from alcohol poisoning at the age of 43. Donald was 35 at
the time, but his brother had long warned him of the dangers of alcohol.
Clearly, Donald Trump got the message. He decided alcohol
wasn't necessary in order to do goofy things. When you have no
inhibitions, there is no need to lose them.
We can all agree that Donald Trump abstaining from alcohol is
a good trait. He joins a long list of Presidents who were teetotalers,
from Millard Fillmore to Rutherford B. Hayes to William Taft to George W.
Bush (later in life).
Others were lushes. Martin Van Buren's nickname was
"Whiskey Van." Franklin Pierce , when he was not nominated for a
second term, said "There is nothing left...but to get drunk."
Ulysses S. Grant was a legendary drinker, and Richard Nixon allegedly had
his moments, especially in the evening.
Not Donald Trump. Whether you like his politics or not, most
people would agree that he takes the presidency to limits it has never
seen before, all without the aid of alcohol. He can bully his opposition,
and ridicule world leaders. He can embarrass himself, and our country, and
wake up without a hangover. He can come up with nicknames like
"Crooked Hillary" or "Rocket Man" and laugh and slam
down a Diet Coke (his favorite drink). In short, he can act like he's
drunk without being drunk.
My only nightmare is that he suddenly decides to go off the
wagon during the summit with North Korea. Rocket Man would probably
not take it well.